Be Thou an Example of the Believers

This is a talk I gave on Aug 28, 2009 to 150 girls ages 8-11.

Our theme for this Activity Day is from the New Testament in I Timothy 4:12. The scripture says, “Be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

What does it mean to be an example? It means to SHOW a person how to do something…they learn to behave a certain way because of how they see YOU act. This scripture says that we are to be examples of the believers; that means a believer in Jesus Christ and in His gospel. It also tells us in what WAYS we are to be an example. The idea that I am planning to talk about today has to do with being an example of charity. Charity means the “pure love of Christ,” or in other words showing the same kind of love to others that Christ would show them.

I want to tell you about a friend of mine, and I want you to think in your mind about this kind of friend.

She has been my friend for ten years. We used to serve in a church calling together. Even though she has moved out of my ward, we are still close friends.

She is the kind of friend that everybody wants to have!! She is always so happy and pleasant to be around; I have never seen her grumpy or pouty. If you tell her about something good that is going on in your life or about something neat that you get to do, she isn’t jealous, she is excited for you. She always tells you things that make you feel good about yourself, like you look nice, or that she heard something good about you…and it isn’t things she is making up just to sound nice, she is telling you those things out of her heart.

When I tell her a secret I know that she is not going to tell anybody else. I don’t remember EVER hearing her say unkind things about another person. The wonderful thing about people that never say unkind things about others is that you know they are never going to say unkind things about YOU!!!!

Isn’t that a wonderful kind of friend to have!!! But now, instead of thinking about how great it would be to HAVE a friend like that, I want YOU to think about what kind of friend YOU are to others!!!

I don’t know about you, but I’m still working on becoming a better friend. Nobody is perfect, but we can all try to do better. I hope that today you will think about some of these traits that good friends have and that you will pick one that you will work on this school year.

In the last Young Women’s broadcast from Salt Lake City, Pres. Monson told a story about a girl named Sandra. There had been some problems when she was born and her brain didn’t work quite right. She didn’t act normal, and sometimes she said things that weren’t appropriate for the situation. She couldn’t walk right and she dressed funny. The girls in her ward ignored her. Her church leaders would be her friends, but the girls wouldn’t.

Then a new girl moved into the ward. Her name was Nancy. Nancy was a cute little red-headed girl that was very popular. She made sure that Sandra was included in everything…she seemed to truly LIKE Sandra!! Finally the other girls realized that being friends with Sandra was the right thing to do, and that she was a valuable daughter of our Heavenly Father. Even after Nancy ended up moving out of their ward, the girls kept being friends with Sandra and being kind to her.

One thing that I am concerned about is how we speak to others. There are a number of TV shows that our family has decided not to watch because of the way the actors talk to each other on the show. They make it look like it is “cool” and “funny” to say rude or cutting things to others. I promise you that speaking like that does NOT make you cool and it isn’t funny; that kind of speaking is from Satan and is meant to destroy other people and your relationships with them.

A lot of people think that it is ok to say rude or hurtful things if at the end they say, “Just kidding!!” However, once those unkind words are said and before you can say the “just kidding” part you have already hurt that person. Saying “just kidding” does NOT erase the pain that you have caused.

I am holding an arrow to show you. What happens when you shoot an arrow into a wood fence? It sticks into the wood because it makes a hole. What happens when you pull it out? Does the hole go away? No, it’s there forever, you can never make that piece of wood completely the same again.

I want you to think of this arrow as being those rude or hurtful words that we talked about. Saying “just kidding” is like pulling the arrow out of the wood – it has already made a hole. You cannot fix it all the way. Do you want things that you say to hurt somebody? Is that what Jesus would do?

Sometimes it is easy for us to look around at others, especially in a situation like this activity, and to feel alone or like we “don’t fit in.” My goal for you today is that I want you to look around at others that are here. Instead of feeling like you don’t fit in or feeling uncomfortable because you are not sitting by one of your friends, I want you to each do what the Savior would do. I want you each to look around and look for ways that YOU can be a good friend to someone else!!! Maybe you will see someone you know from school that you think could use a friend, or maybe you will see a new person and you could get to know them and help them have a good experience at our activity.

I want to bear you my testimony that I know that when you are a good friend to others, and that when you treat others the way that Jesus would, that YOUR own life will be blessed with many wonderful and kind friends in return.

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.